


Unsung Heroes

by ReeLeeV



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Actors, Friends to Lovers, Hyungki rise, M/M, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change, based around song of achilles, based off achilles and patroclus, of course, side!joohyuk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:55:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24153160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReeLeeV/pseuds/ReeLeeV
Summary: Kihyun and Hyungwon have been part of the Starship Acting Troupe for years now, having been scouted in college along with their friends. However, they’ve never been given roles like this before… It’s been 57 shows since they’ve begun this retelling of Patroclus and Achilles. There’s 13 shows left, 13 kissing scenes Kihyun has left before he loses this chance to confess his feelings for Hyungwon. If only he could get up the nerve.
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 33
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BananaMilk514](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BananaMilk514/gifts).



> I return with an adopted concept and some good vibes, my friends~ Shout out to BananaMilk for yet again inspiring me so hardcore <3333333333

Kihyun rushes up to the camp he’s shared with Hyungwon for ten years now, clutching onto his front as panic fills his eyes. 

“You have to go help them!!!” he cries out, his voice strangled and taut. Hyungwon’s eyes are hard on his as sounds of battle ring out around them, shadows of their falling brethren encircling them. “I know he’s wronged you, but you will be remembered for only this if you do not intercede now!”

“I have given my word,” Hyungwon tells him, his voice stonelike. “What’s done is done, I cannot intervene until Agamemnon apologizes. He  _ must _ kneel.” Kihyun pauses, glancing towards the implied scenes of battle offstage. His grip on Hyungwon’s tunic slackens just a bit, but then tightens back up in thought.

“Send me in your place!! Let me wear your armor, I’ll—”

“Patroclus,  _ no _ ,” Hyungwon immediately responds, a heartbreaking fear suddenly flooding his voice. “You’re not a fighter, and I’m not losing you to this.”

“But I won’t fight,” Kihyun insists, almost laughing breathlessly, as if he’s cracked the code. “They’ll only think it’s you, and they’ll turn running! Send some troops with me to fight while I ride around. Your name alone will be enough to rally the men together.” Hyungwon steps back, regarding him in uncertainty. However, just like every show, he relents. 

And thus, Kihyun dons Achilles’ armor as Patroclus, and he is sent out into battle. However, before he does so, there’s a moment in which he’s standing in Achilles’ chariot. Hyungwon’s hand is on his, and they’re eye level due to the height of the prop. Kihyun has learned to hide his anxious gulp as Hyungwon leans in for that final kiss, the last kiss before Kihyun dies and is left to watch the rest of the Trojan War as a wandering spirit. 

Hyungwon’s lips are soft and pillowy as always, giving the right amount of desperate pressure to steal Kihyun’s breath away despite this being the 57th time they’ve done this particular scene. He feels himself swoon along with the audience every time, trying to not think too hard still about how perfectly their mouths seem to just  _ fit _ . He leans closer as Hyungwon pulls away despite himself, and he has to force himself upright. Hyungwon gives him a worried grin, and Kihyun assures him he’ll be back soon. 

He then rides off to his death.

“And that’s another one for the books!” their stage manager calls, pulling their director by the arm as she pops open a bottle of champagne. Kihyun echoes the rest of their cheers, shifting in his tunic as he waits politely for a glass to be poured for him before shuffling off to change. The director starts rattling on about how it isn’t too much longer now, how they’ve only 13 shows before the end. Kihyun feels a lump rise in his throat, taking the glass with a tight smile before wandering out of the room. He goes to his dressing room, sitting down in the makeup chair with a sigh.

He stares at his own reflection, pursing his lips at how his own face has thinned out. All these shows aren’t exactly the best for his health, but he hadn’t realized he’d lost so much weight… He shakes his head at himself as he reaches for a makeup wipe and starts cleaning the war makeup off his face, touches gentle yet precise. There’s a soft knock, and he doesn’t bother stopping when Hyungwon slips in with his own glass of champagne.

“Here’s to us~” Hyungwon says jokingly, raising the glass in a toast. Kihyun hums noncommittally, dropping one wipe on the vanity for a new one. Hyungwon frowns at this, walking closer to him and setting his own champagne beside Kihyun’s. “You don’t sound all that excited about another great show led by us, i’m hurt…” He pokes his lower lip out in a pout, but Kihyun can tell with a single glance into his eyes that he’s only teasing.

“I only want to get home,” Kihyun manages to say, wiping his hands on a towel before reaching into his eyes to retrieve his contacts. “It’s been a long night.” Hyungwon watches his reflection for a moment, as if waiting for more of an explanation, but he eventually turns away to step behind the partition.

“For an actor,” Hyungwon says, his voice muffled as he starts changing into his street clothes, “you’re an awful liar.” Kihyun frowns at this himself, pushing his glasses onto his face as he pointedly doesn’t look in Hyungwon’s general direction. Well, what exactly is he supposed to say? Hey, I’ve had a crush on you for the passed few months, so why don’t we go out? No, that wouldn’t work. Hyungwon would only think he was joking… mostly.

“It’s rude to call your hyung a liar,” Kihyun eventually says, standing from his chair to change, as well. He keeps a careful eye on the partition, borderline glaring at it as he tries to keep his tone light. He’s always just so worn out after a show, emotionally and physically, and it makes it even harder to keep this secret hidden from one of his best friends. He sits on the couch once he’s dressed, crossing one leg over the other and twiddling away on his phone as Hyungwon takes his sweet time getting ready. He eventually steps out from behind the partition, wearing dark tight jeans tucked into combat boots that nearly reach his knees and a dark t-shirt. 

Kihyun tries not to ogle him too much as he stands from the couch, retrieving his keys from the vanity. Hyungwon follows him out, downing both glasses of champagne and taking the glasses to set in the hall before locking the dressing room behind them. Kihyun leads him to his motorcycle, starting it up and revving it up satisfyingly as Hyungwon settles behind him. He wraps his arms around Kihyun’s waist, and Kihyun has to try hard not to lean back against his hold as he takes off.

The cool night air whips passed them, ruffling through Kihyun’s hair. He zips them passed the shops, over the train tracks, and over the bridge. The stars glitter down over them, and barely anyone is on the streets. It’s that perfect time of night when all the nightowls are still at the bars and all the homebodies are fast asleep. Kihyun pulls to a stop outside of a modest townhouse, leaning his bike to the side after parking and propping it with his kickstand. Hyungwon lingers for a moment before sliding off, running his long fingers through his hair.

“I’ll see you in a couple days, Patroclus~” Hyungwon tells him with a wink. He turns and saunters towards his door, and Kihyun remains where he is until Hyungwon is safely in his home. Kihyun sighs heavily, pulling a piece of gum from his jacket pocket and starting to chew anxiously as he straightens his bike back up.

“I think I love you too much, Achilles,” he mutters, leaning his head back to stare at all the heroes’ constellations before returning his gaze to the road. Of course, Achilles isn’t actually up there… He figures the real Achilles’ beauty would’ve outshone any other constellation, just like his Wonnie.


	2. Chapter 2

Hyungwon leans back in his chair with a sigh, tilting his head against Minhyuk’s shoulder as he watches Kihyun discuss something with the director onstage. He props his feet up against the row of seats in front of him, crossing his arms over his chest. Minhyuk pats his knee distractedly, and Hyungwon doesn’t realize he’s pouting until Minhyuk asks him what’s wrong. He huffs a breath through his nose, short and heavy.

“It’s weird how this is almost over,” Hyungwon finally manages to say, though it isn’t really what’s bothering him. And he can tell by how Minhyuk snickers that his best friend can tell there’s more to it than that.

“Weirder how you and Kihyunnie _haven’t_ hooked up yet, if you ask me,” Minhyuk says back, crossing his own arms as he mirrors Hyungwon’s position. Hyungwon groans softly under his breath, eyes trained on the man in question as he mimics a fighting move. Always the perfectionist, even over a role he’s played countless times.

“I just have to wait until this is over,” Hyungwon tells him, almost defensive. “I don’t want to confess only to have him say ‘You’re just forgetting the difference between the parts we play and us, Wonnie. You only feel for Patroclus, not me.’ Or, ‘We can’t do anything about it, Wonnie, think of the scandal.’ I couldn’t bear it…” 

“You _really_ think that’d be his reaction?” Minhyuk asks, sounding just incredulous enough for Hyungwon to straighten up and look him in the eye. Minhyuk blinks unevenly at him, his lips pursed. “Are you seriously trying to tell me you haven’t realized how head over heels he is for you…? Cause to the rest of us it’s pretty obvious.”

“Shut up…” Hyungwon mutters, trying for a playful push but it coming out more nervous than anything. Minhyuk snickers beside him, nudging him back with a lighter touch. 

“I’m being serious here, Won,” Minhyuk finally says, for once keeping his voice low. Kihyun glances their way distractedly, as if sensing something amiss, and Minhyuk only waves his fingers playfully at him. Kihyun scoffs so loud Hyungwon can hear it echo from the stage, and he’s relieved when Kihyun looks away with a roll of his eyes. Minhyuk’s demeanor turns sober once more when Kihyun returns his focus towards the task at hand. “They way he looks at you, it’s like something out of a—”

“Wonnie!” Kihyun calls from the stage, his tone somewhat distracted. Jooheon saunters over to where they’re sitting, slumping down next to Minhyuk with a sigh as Hyungwon raises a brow in question. “Get up here, I want to run through this with you.”

“We’ve done this scene hundreds of times,” Hyungwon complains, though he stands, anyway. Minhyuk shoots him an encouraging thumbs up as he saunters towards the stage. Minhyuk leans against Jooheon as he watches, his two friends standing a bit too close together to murmur between themselves. He purses his lips, truly at a loss as to why they haven’t admitted their feelings for each other yet.

“You think they’ll finally be honest with each other by the final curtain call?” Jooheon asks, his voice low. Minhyuk snickers, raising a single shoulder in a shrug.

“Who can tell?” he asks, his fingers curling around Jooheon’s bicep. “I could’ve sworn they’d have broken down by now, but apparently not… Not even an embarrassing, drunken one night stand to speak of.” Minhyuk huffs out a breath, shaking his head. “Honestly, I thought I had taught Won better than that.” Jooheon chuckles softly, and Minhyuk feels the younger press a kiss to the top of his head, and Minhyuk hums softly at the affection as he snuggles a little closer.

Oddly enough, Kihyun is happiest when he’s dead, as Hyungwon cradles his body. In other scenarios, of course, there’d be a body double. However, their cast is smaller, and there isn’t really time for a body double to be smuggled onto stage between when Kihyun dies as Patroclus and Hyungwon as Achilles cradles him close to his chest to carry him back into their tent to keep by his side until he finally gets the courage to burn his corpse on a pyre.

It’s strangely about as close to being held so lovingly by Hyungwon that he feels he’s able to get. 

Their director and stage manager pop open another bottle of champagne, toast the performances yet again. Kihyun drives Hyungwon home again, and they go through the normal routine. Kihyun keeps his mouth shut, choosing instead to lie awake long after saying goodbye to his co-lead and just thinking about how good it would feel to be held so close. Hyungwon is always surprisingly warm, though if it’s due to the stage lights or Kihyun’s own flushed body he isn’t sure. He doesn’t know, either, just how much longer he can last like this. 

One way or another, he has to tell Hyungwon how he feels before the final show. He doesn’t know if he can even get Hyungwon to believe him, but right about now he figures it's worth the chance. He doesn’t think he can stand this not knowing anymore, doesn’t think he can endure anymore sleepless nights on top of these shows. And, if Hyungwon ends up not feeling the same as he’s sure to do, then Kihyun can just call this his last performance with the Starship Acting Troupe. He’s gotten offers before to be on television, he can always transition into that. Or, he could go into broadway. Either way, he has a way out to keep things from being too awkward after his impending rejection.

Unbeknownst to him, in a modest townhouse by the river, Hyungwon lies wide awake, his arms hugging a pillow to his chest. No matter how long he holds it, it still doesn’t come close to how warm Kihyun is. Before, when they’d started the shows, Hyungwon hadn’t been able to pick him up, having been too weak. However, he worked hard and, with the help of Hoseok and Hyunwoo, he’s at least able to carry Kihyun around now… for at least a short bit of time. He still remembers the older’s surprise at being picked up the first time not by an extra but by Hyungwon himself, how he had nearly broken character.

Hyungwon can’t help but smile at the memory, the smell of Kihyun’s cologne floating up from his shirt from the ride back and causing Hyungwon’s heart to ease. He has only twelve more shows, and then he can tell Kihyun how he feels. He won’t have to wait anymore, won’t have to worry about at least half the excuses Kihyun could come up with to deny they belong together. He’ll admit, a part of him _is_ worried that he’s simply letting all the kissing scenes get to his head. But, whenever that thought rises, he assures himself with how his own heart races when Kihyun draws near backstage, giving him those coy smirks and those glittering stares. 

Those kinds of stirrings in his gut that take him back to when he was experiencing crushes for the first time… Kihyun makes him feel like a kid again, like everything is so new and wonderful and has every possibility to work out—or fail. It’s something he hasn’t felt in such a long time, and it just has to be more than just getting caught up in the feelings he conveys onstage. Kihyun means more to him than that, always has to some extent… 

Hyungwon sighs heavily, curling around the spare pillow a bit tighter and remembering how firm Kihyun’s chest is under his touch. He shuts his eyes tight, knowing he can’t go on for another performance with the little sleep he’s been getting every night. If for anything else, he can’t allow himself to falter and throw Kihyun off.


	3. Chapter 3

Hyungwon watches his best friend, lover, and soulmate stand before him in all his defiant glory, staring him down and insisting so fervently how he should be allowed to potentially sacrifice himself for Hyungwon’s safety. Wait, no. Achilles’s safety. Hyungwon mentally sighs at himself before getting his head back into the scene, turning away from Kihyun as he always does in outward defiance at the mere suggestion. Though, at the thought of Kihyun dying for him—even if it is as Patrochlus—he doesn’t have to fake the heartbreak that skips across his face.

He does, though, have to fake the friendliness after the show when there are two strange men waiting for them near their dressing room door. As they walk, he can’t help but take a step closer to Kihyun protectively, reaching out to grab onto the fabric of his stage tunic. 

“My, you two put on quite a show,” says one of the men, the taller one. He straightens out his casual white button down, his smile overly cocky. 

“Thank you, Mr…?” Kihyun starts, always being the one to greet first. He puts a hand against the small of Hyungwon’s back, as if that’ll somehow put him at ease—and Hyungwon almost curses the fact that it does—before stepping forward and offering out a hand to shake.

“You don’t need to know our names, son,” says the older of the two. “Just the name of our employer.” He offers out a card from the inner-pocket of his sports jacket, almost waving it around like it’s some magical relic. Kihyun purses his lips and takes the card, but after a quick glance at it he pockets it with a thick gulp before looking to Hyungwon.

“Go on ahead,” he says softly, nodding towards the dressing room. Hyungwon doesn’t like strangers, Kihyun knows that, but he’s more than willing to put aside his own shyness to make sure Kihyun isn’t jumped or something. Hyungown frowns, about to tell him as much, but Kihyun gives him one of those dashing little smiles and his heart nearly falls out of his body. “I won’t be long, I promise.” Hyungwon hesitates before nodding, glancing silently at the other two before pointedly stepping between them to get to the door of their dressing room.

If Kihyun isn’t inside by the time he finishes changing clothes, he’s coming back out.

Kihyun gulps thickly as he watches Hyungwon disappear behind the door, a bit unsure as to why he’s just sent him away in the first place. But, he’d seen how tense Hyungwon had become at seeing these two men, how his eyes had grown strained. He knows Hyungwon doesn’t like being around strangers, especially not when it’s right after a show and he’s running on much less sleep than he needs. The name from the business card flashes in Kihyun’s mind, and it feels like the card is burning in his pocket.

_ Kim Shidae, Owner of XM Entertainment _

“XM?” Kihyun asks with a note of amusement, his lips pulling up into a smirk. “And what exactly does XM want with us?”

“Our employer has heard of your acting troupe, and more specifically heard of you,” the taller says, nodding towards Kihyun as if that’ll somehow prove his point. “He’d like to recruit you for an upcoming history drama. For a… crowning jewel of a role, if you know what I mean.” Kihyun’s eyes widen… He very much does know what he means. A history drama, which just so happens to be his favorite kind, is looking to hire for a role of nobility. He had heard through the grapevine that XME was planning to delve into a new venture fairly soon, but he hasn’t been able to keep up with it due to the shows here.

He doesn’t realize his mouth has dropped open in shock until the two representatives chuckle at him. He quickly straightens out his own expression, pulling on his professional charm. 

“Send an email to the address on the card,” the older says with a wave. “You’ll be in contact with the hiring agent. She’ll send you a portion of the script for you to prepare an audition around. However, that’s only a formality. The role is yours if you want it.”

“I’ll need to speak with production before I make a decision,” Kihyun tells them both, earning a look of surprise. “I want to know the filming schedule, how long this will take me away from the troupe.”

“I wouldn’t be too concerned about your little troupe, Mr. Yoo,” the older tells him. “After this drama, you could very well find yourself on the fastrack to fame on the screen, both big and small. It could be the launchpad for a new phase in your career.” Kihyun’s taken aback by this. Sure, he’s always wanted to break into television or even movies once he got far enough into his career, but the fastrack? A big break? He can’t lie, he’s been dreaming for something like this to happen. But, at the same time, he doesn’t feel like he’s ready to say goodbye to the troupe yet. Or, really, to Hyungwon… 

“Of course, you’ll need some time to think it over,” the taller of the two says, giving him a short bow. “Email the office in two weeks with a decision. We eagerly await your word.” The older takes his lead and bows, as well, before they both walk off down the hall and disappear out the side door. Kihyun gulps thickly, chewing on the inside of his cheek. 

Holy  _ shit _ … 

He takes a moment to compose himself, inhaling and exhaling deeply before he opens the door and inadvertently causes Hyungwon to fall hard against him. Kihyun catches him easily, the younger falling against his chest with his palms flattened out against him as if he’s catching himself. Hyungwon’s big doe eyes shine with the light of a caught man, and Kihyun can’t help but smirk.

“Eavesdrop much?” he asks, though in the back of his mind he can’t help but be suspicious of what all Hyungwon could’ve heard. Hyungwon huffs out a breath, though he doesn’t pull away as he pouts at Kihyun in return.

“What’d they have to say? Who’s their employer?” 

Kihyun hums, unsure as to why he’s hesitating to answer. Well… he supposes part of it is due to how close Hyungwon is and how much that’s throwing him off, how he can smell the sweat of the stage and the faintest hint of his cologne. How Hyungwon is very much in kissing range, and what’s wrong with a little practice for the big scene of their final goodbyes for tomorrow night even though they’ve performed it a hundred times?

“Oh my  _ god _ ,” catcalls a boisterous voice from the end of the hall, sounding absolutely scandalized. Kihyun and Hyungwon both look to see Minhyuk smirking at them from the other end, practically hanging out of his own dressing room. “Just make out already!! We  _ all _ know you want to!!”

“Shut up, Min!” Kihyun and Hyungwon say simultaneously, scrambling to put some space between themselves despite how Kihyun wants exactly the opposite to happen. He huffs out a sigh, rolling his eyes as he walks passed Hyungwon into their room. Hyungwon watches, closing the door behind them and crossing his arms.

“Well?” he prompts, and Kihyun had almost forgotten he’d been asked anything in the first place. Almost. He’s quiet as he starts taking off his makeup. 

“Nothing important,” he finally answers, figuring this way is easier. He doesn’t want to add any more stress to Hyungwon’s plate by making him think he’s about to leave when he himself isn’t sure. Not that he thinks it’d stress Hyungwon out  _ too _ much, though a selfish part of him wishes it would. “They were just trying to sell me something.” Hyungwon is quiet for a moment, though Kihyun can still feel his eyes on him. He turns around in his chair just as it seems Hyungwon is about to speak, once his makeup is completely off and his glasses are back on, and he feels a ball of want rise in his throat.

“Come with me to get coffee tomorrow,” he says, not really a question but a request all the same. Hyungwon’s clearly surprised by the sudden topic change, but Kihyun doesn’t let the younger’s expression phase him. He’s not sure if he’s about to leave the troupe for good or not, but he also doesn’t want to make a decision like this without Hyungwon… But, first things first. Despite having wanted to wait, he has to tell Hyungwon how he feels. The whole getting a life changing offer is giving him a bit of a carpe diem effect, and he won’t lose it. 

Besides, if Hyungwon ends up rejecting him, he can just use this as a way to escape his heartbreak… There’s nothing wrong with that.


	4. Chapter 4

Hyungwon doesn’t really know what he’s expecting when he meets Kihyun for coffee the following afternoon. It isn’t as if they haven’t hung out outside of work before, mind you, but he’s definitely also made an effort to not see Kihyun as much since he’d become aware of his crush… It’s easier to keep himself from accidentally slipping up and saying something stupid like “go on a date with me you cocky piece of shit” when his dumb, pretty face isn’t around. 

“You aren’t tied up in the mafia, are you?” Hyungwon asks, still prodding about what had happened with those two strange men the night before. “Those weren’t two hired guns threatening to take you out if you didn’t pay some kind of protection fee, were they?”

“What kind of stuff have you been watching?” Kihyun asks, chuckling softly at the outlandish scenario. Hyungwon pouts, his puffy lips pursing together in a frown in defiance. 

“Well?? You won’t tell me what it really was, so…” Hyungwon says with a shrug, admitting to knowing that Kihyun and lied to him before. He hadn’t said so before now, though he’s fairly certain with the lack of reaction from the older that he’d already known.

“There’s… something more important I have to tell you first,” Kihyun says, leaning against the small table between them. His lower lip is pinned between his teeth, and there’s some underlying anxiety in his eyes. Hyungwon wishes he could make it go away, that he could just make everything better by holding Kihyun’s hand. However, that’s a role for a boyfriend, not a co-lead. It’s a shame he doesn’t believe he can be both… Kihyun breathes deeply, and Hyungwon watches as his lips quirk into the most hopeful of smirks he thinks he’s ever seen.

For some reason, his heart starts to beat so hard he feels like its about to break a hole into his ribcage. He can’t name why, but he thinks this is about to be The Moment when Kihyun admits he has feelings for him, and that can they please just stop these stupid games and start going out already? Then it’ll be Hyungwon’s turn to be surprised, because how can Kihyun be so sure he returns such a sentiment? But then they’ll laugh because how could he not? It’s so obvious in the way Hyungwon looks at him… Hyungwon blinks himself out of the daydream once, then twice, and suddenly he’s grounded by the borderline panic in Kihyun’s eyes.

“S-Sorry,” he says softly, shaking his head at himself. “What was that?” Kihyun blinks, obviously dumbfounded. 

“ _ Jesus _ ,” he breathes out as Hyungwon starts to drink his latte, “I never thought I’d fall for such an airhead.”

Hyungwon chokes on his sweet espresso drink, coughing up the beverage through his nose. The burn brings tears to his eyes, and he’s vaguely aware of Kihyun offering him a napkin. He takes it and dabs at his face, wholly embarrassed.

“F-Fall for??” he can’t help but demand, sure he hadn’t heard him right. Kihyun raises a single brow, nodding as that insipid smirk of his grows. “Like, I mean, like—?” The panic in his voice seems to give Kihyun some new level of confidence, Hyungwon can see it in his eyes. And he’s pretty sure that look alone will be the death of him.

“Like I want to take you on dates,” Kihyun says softly, reaching forward and starting to pet the inside of Hyungwon’s forearm with his index finger, “and hold your hand, and I want to kiss you and… do other things to you~” He smirks so wide his silver tooth shows, and Hyungwon for some reason decides to focus on that, like it’ll make him calm down. It doesn’t, of course, because he feels his cheeks heating up and he has to move his gaze to the table again. Everywhere Kihyun’s fingertip touches him feels like he’s been licked by fire, but he doesn’t mind the burn.

He doesn’t think he’ll ever mind anything if it’s from Kihyun.

“You’re such an asshole,” Hyungwon pouts, pressing the napkin to his nose to ensure no more coffee is dripping out. Kihyun snickers softly, and Hyungwon can’t help how he eases at hearing the sound. Kihyun’s hand seems to hesitate before settling in Hyungwon’s, and Hyungwon gratefully takes the opportunity to braid their fingers together.

“Real nice,” Kihyun says, his voice taking a playful upturn at the end. “I finally admit my real feelings for you and you call me an asshole. Not any acceptance, not any ‘wow hyung I’m so honored, I’ve always liked you, too.’ Just calling me an asshole.” Hyungwon can’t help the laugh that escapes him, feeling Kihyun’s eyes on their intertwined fingers. He can’t help but take the opportunity to study how well they fit together, just like their lips when they kiss… 

“Obviously I like you, too,” Hyungwon says, rolling his eyes as if that were the most obvious thing in the world to hide his own fear. Sure, Kihyun’s already admitted to liking him, too, but he still can’t help but be nervous. Kihyun hums, leaning even closer, and Hyungwon feels himself lean in, too, like a moth to a flame. He can see his own happiness and relief shining back at him in Kihyun’s eyes, and he blinks slowly, eyes flitting towards Kihyun’s lips. He wants to kiss him as themselves for the first time, not as Achilles and Patroclus, the doomed lovers. He wants to start the road to his own happy ending, and for some reason he has a feeling Kihyun can get him there.

“You… may not when I tell you what those men were here for,” Kihyun admits, sitting back in his chair. His lower lip is back between his teeth, and Hyungwon frowns at the sudden shift. Kihyun seems unable to meet his eyes, and that’s so unlike the older. He feels his own anxieties spike once more, and he can’t help but gulp thickly.

“Go on…” he prompts, retracting his hand to cross his arms over his chest. He’s getting ready for disappointment. Kihyun watches him take the defensive stance, a special level of hurt in his eyes as he nods once before exhaling woefully through his nose.

“I got a job offer,” he starts, and Hyungwon’s shoulders start to fall. He opens his mouth to ask why that’s such a bad thing. After all, they all do work outside of the troupe every now and then. “It’s… pretty big. Big enough to catapult my career into television and movies and who knows what else.” Hyungwon’s brow furrows.

“Okay? And?”

“And, from the sound of it,” Kihyun goes on to say, “it’ll take me permanently off the stage… It’d make me leave the troupe.”

And there it is, the other shoe dropping to stomp on Hyungwon’s heart.


	5. Chapter 5

“Wonnie…?” Kihyun asks hesitantly, leaning forward in his chair. He watches Hyungwon’s face for any sign of how he feels about the news, but Hyungwon’s face has fallen into a chilling slab of stone. Kihyun purses his lips, gulping thickly as he just stares. Hyungwon seems to take a moment to even register Kihyun has spoken again, and when he looks up Kihyun almost wishes he hadn’t. The pure heartache there where only joy had been only seconds ago… Wow, Kihyun really sucks at this whole dating thing.

“And you’re taking it?” Hyungwon prompts, his voice detached. Kihyun squeezes his own knees, feeling so lame for only giving half of a shrug.

“I don’t know yet,” he answers honestly, and Hyungwon’s subsequent scoff feels like a ton of bricks slamming into his back.

“Why not?” Hyungwon questions as he takes the last sips of his drink. He stands, as if that ends the conversation. “If it’s that important for your career, I don’t see why you’d stay here.” He turns to leave, and Kihyun is quick to bolt up after him and grab his wrist.

“Because!” KIhyun bursts out defensively, suddenly so terribly panicked. His tone and volume causes a few people to look towards them, and Kihyun smiles nervously as he bows in apology. Hyungwon’s out the door by the time he finishes, and he has to hurry after him. “I don’t know if I’m willing to give the troupe up, give  _ you _ up, just for my career! Wonnie!” he huffs out, desperate for Hyungwon to stop with his brisk pace. He’s already at least seven feet ahead of him, and it’s hard enough keeping up with him when he’s walking normally with those long legs of his, much less when he’s walking at a faster pace. Hyungwon stops, thankfully, when Kihyun calls his name, and Kihyun scrambles to close the distance.

“What was even the point of you telling me how you feel if you’re just going to leave??” Hyungwon finally asks, still not meeting Kihyun’s eyes even as Kihyun stands in front of him. His tone is so despondent, and the pout pulling at his lips is almost adorable enough for Kihyun to kiss him then and there. 

“Because,” Kihyun breathes out, reaching out to take Hyungwon’s hands in his own. Hyungwon pulls his away, and Kihyun only chuckles softly as he settles for grabbing only one for now. “No matter what I decide, I want to be with you, Wonnie…”

“Long distance?” Hyungwon asks, sounding hesitant.

“You don’t think that’d work…?”

“For some people, maybe,” Hyungwon answers, glancing into Kihyun’s eyes meaningfully, “but I don’t think it’d work for us…” Kihyun feels a ball of something sticky and sad fill his throat, and he struggles to gulp it down. Disappointment, probably. It’s hard to tell sometimes, with how he has to police his own emotions so much onstage.

“Well,” Kihyun says briskly, trying to be upbeat about the situation, “I’m not leaving yet, which means for the time being you’re stuck with me~” He tries to be a bit teasing to get Hyungwon to relax, and it seems to do the trick as a smile pulls at his lips. “Come on, you can ride with me,” he offers, grabbing Hyungwon by the arm and pulling him towards his bike. 

“Where are we going…?”

“Somewhere you’re gonna like,” Kihyun answers cheekily, throwing him a playful glance over his shoulder. The foggy hurt in Hyungwon’s eyes finally dissipates fully to show off the beautiful flecks of happiness within. Kihyun feels accomplished at that, just glad to have distracted him enough to make him happy again. Hyungwon only deserves to be happy… even if this whole thing just got so much more complicated than he could’ve imagined it would. 

Hyungwon weasels his way into staying over at Kihyun’s that evening after a day of shopping and movie-going. Being with Kihyun has been easy, natural… Though, there was that one tense moment when they were watching the opening credits at the movie to see it had been done by XM Entertainment… the company trying to take Kihyun away from Hyungwon… Well, at least that overblown company has taste, Hyungwon will give it that much.

They don’t talk about the elephant in the room. Hyungwon doesn’t make jokes about what Kihyun’s going to do with his freetime if he leaves, and Kihyun doesn’t tease about how he shouldn’t even be wasting time with Hyungwon when he has so much packing to do. Hyungwon just clings to Kihyun a little tighter, finally able to hold his hand only for his own stupid head to count down the seconds until he won’t be able to anymore. The only time it comes up again is when Kihyun asks Hyungwon to not bring it up around the others. Hyungwon tilts his head a bit as he snuggles against Kihyun’s side, the covers tangled around his legs.

“I just don’t want to worry them,” Kihyun says with a sigh, as if hearing the question in Hyungwon’s mind.

“But you felt the need to worry me?” Hyungwon asks, his tone teasing even though the meaning is true. He’ll admit, a part of him wishes Kihyun hadn’t told him everything today like he had. At least let him live in ignorant bliss for a couple days, just so he can fully enjoy being with the older.

“You’re special,” Kihyun answers, turning his head to stare directly into his eyes. Hyungwon’s breath catches in his throat at the sincerity in his voice, and he’s overcome with the urge to kiss him. He feels Kihyun’s hands holding him so carefully, like he’s the most precious thing in all the world, and he just loses himself in the feeling. He holds on hard to Kihyun’s shoulders as they kiss, as if silently forbidding him to leave.


	6. Chapter 6

Kihyun and Hyungwon aren’t really expecting much when they go into work the next day. They had a lazy morning around Kihyun’s house, the older making them breakfast and then berating Hyungwon for how he doesn’t even offer to clean up after the meal with him, and then go to work. However, the warm bubbly feeling in Kihyun’s chest falters when they use the backstage entrance, their director and fellow troupe members already there.

“You two seem pretty happy,” Minhyuk says before the director can speak. Kihyun smirks, shrugging. He feels Hyungwon’s defenses rise, and he instinctively starts drawing little circles at the base of his back to help him ease. He notices a newspaper in their director’s hands, and his eyebrows raise.

“What’s happening in the world?” Kihyun asks, nodding towards the newspaper. The woman purses her lips, flicking out the paper so they can read the headline. It’s a picture taken—without their permission—of Hyungwon and Kihyun. It seems to be from the day before, Kihyun wiping a bit of ice cream off Hyungwon’s lower lip on a park bench. Kihyun frowns hard at this, glancing towards the director again. “Yeah…? We’re dating, what of it?”

Hoseok suddenly bursts forward from the ranks, pulling them both into a spine-crushing embrace. They both grunt under the pressure, glancing at each other questioningly across Hoseok’s broad back. So, are they not in trouble…?

“Tell us next time, so we can have a statement prepar—”

“We’re so happy for you!!!!” Hoseok bursts out, cutting off their director. “I know we joked about it a lot, but we really never thought the day would come!”

“About time you swallowed your pride, Ki,” Minhyuk says with a smirk. Kihyun can’t glare at him fast enough, throwing daggers at him and only causing him to cackle.

“This  _ is  _ going to be great for sales,” the director continues, seeming lost in her own world. She turns and walks further through the building, muttering just enough within earshot for Kihyun to catch something about possibly having to extend the show’s running time to compensate for this turn… Hoseok pulls away and claps them on the shoulders before Hyunwoo steps forward, gently pulling him away and causing the rest of them to disperse. Kihyun feels a ball of guilt rise in his throat, and he glances to Hyungwon for… well, he isn’t quite sure. Understanding? Comfort?

Hyungwon only watches him with guarded eyes, as if waiting already for heartache. This only serves to worsen Kihyun’s guilt. He takes the younger’s hand in his and squeezes, pulling him closer enough to kiss him on the jaw. 

If the new job is wreaking this much havoc on his personal life before he even takes it, should he really even accept…?

“Of course you should,” Hyungwon tells Kihyun later that night. After the performance and after the rounds of congratulations for having a packed house that night—and in fact having to turn some people away—Kihyun had gone over to Hyungwon’s for a change of pace. Hyungwon’s currently leaning over his island, his chin propped against his hands as he watches Kihyun throw together a late night meal of ramen and egg fried rice. Kihyun doesn’t hide his surprise at Hyungwon’s immediate answer to the burning question he’s had since they got to work earlier that day, and Hyungwon huffs out a sigh of exasperation.

“I’m not saying take it because I  _ want _ you to leave, but I do want you to succeed…” Hyungwon goes on to explain. Kihyun turns back around to continue cooking, listening as he ignores the stone in his gut. “If this is still the path you want your career to take, then go for it. I mean, I’d miss you like crazy, we all would, but I’m not going to stand in the way.” Kihyun exhales a long breath through his focused pout, seeing the two paths open up clearly before him.

On the left: he stays with the troupe and continues traveling and acting whatever stageplay they got hired to do. He stays with his friends, with Hyungwon, and he possibly has a future of Hyungwon being much more than just a new boyfriend… They live comfortably, but they’re never rich. They’re never a household name. On the right: his dreams of success he’s had since high school  _ happen _ . This drama opens up all the right doors for him, he gets thrust into the life of the rich and famous. His name lives on countless people’s lips, he has more fans than he could possibly dream of. He becomes an advocate with all this money, donating to the arts and to children in need… But, he doesn’t have Hyungwon. Or his friends.

Two years ago, the answer would’ve been a no-brainer. In fact, he wouldn’t have had to take the proffered week to think about it. He’d have told those suits then and there that he’d take it, that he’d be in their office Monday for the audition. He’d have burst into the dressing room, told Hyungwon that he’s leaving, had a huge goodbye dinner, and been sent on his way.

That was before annoying feelings got in the way, before he got attached to the troupe. Before he got attached to Hyungwon, and he honestly doesn’t think he wants to cut the chord yet. Especially not now, when he’d finally been pushed to confess to him. Sure, they’ve technically only been together for two days, but it’s probably been the best two days in his life… 

Is it worth throwing away this opportunity, or does he keep to his original life’s dedication and make a career like no other in the entertainment industry?

Kihyun shakes his head free of such thoughts, knowing he still has a few days to make a decision. He focuses on the now, on his perfect boyfriend and his quaint life. He plates up the food and enlists Hyungwon’s help to carry it. They eat at the coffee table, catching up on a drama they both watch while leaning against each other with the couch behind them as a backrest. Hyungwon falls asleep first, snoring loudly against Kihyun’s shoulder. Kihyun shakes his head, smiling at him fondly as he pushes the plates away and gently pulls away. He picks Hyungwon’s light form up and carries him with minimal difficulty to the bedroom. 

When he returns after cleaning up the dishes from dinner and slides into bed, Hyungwon immediately latches onto him. He chuckles softly, petting at Hyungwon’s hair and holding onto him. Hyungwon’s snoring stops for a moment, a small hum of contentment spilling from his lips instead, and Kihyun can’t help but smile. He shuts his eyes, a small voice in the back of his mind wishing for this to be how he ends every day.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Twitter @ReeLeeV1 to scream about hyungki/mx stuff in general with me <33333


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